11 Signs of Successful State Sponsored Re-patriatization

Top 11 signs that we're becoming accustomed to American life:

1. Our home is regularly messy and dinner no longer magically appears on a daily basis.

2. "Hey look! Lucky Charms!" has turned into "Not more Lucky Charms."

3. The sound of a car horn once again has meaning.

4. Although our children's toys still say "Made in China", they now last longer than 30 minutes.

5. Our clothes no longer smell like they were washed in 700 degree water filled with heavily perfumed and opaquely pink laundry detergents named "Happy".

6. We openly drink from any faucet in the house without fear of ingesting some unpronounceable parasite.

7. It hurts that our current babysitting budget is more than twice our former utilities and grocery bills combined.

8. We get upset and immediately call the electric company when our power goes out.

9. Ainsley's annoyed that in being the top of her class requires more than being a native English speaker.

10. Kids are bewildered by sidewalks that contiguously run along any given street.

11. We're starting to get suspicious at people who suddenly have somewhere to be when we begin sentences with "When we lived in Albania..."